


Gleeful

by transfixeddream



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-17
Updated: 2011-05-17
Packaged: 2017-10-19 12:16:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/200765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transfixeddream/pseuds/transfixeddream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Jensen is an extreme Kurt!boy and Jared is his arch nemesis - an extreme Puck!boy.</p><p>Also posted <a href="http://transfixeddream.livejournal.com/82935.html">here</a>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gleeful

At first, Jensen didn't really like _Glee_. Sandy made him watch it with her the first couple of times, but in Jensen's opinion it was a whole lot of screwed up plot points mixed with pretty awkward song selections. (If he's learned anything from the first season of _Glee_ it's that Matthew Morrison should never be allowed to rap. Ever.) But still, he didn't get to spend nearly enough time with Sandy as he'd like to, so he kept watching.

Jensen called Kurt's homosexuality from his first scene (seriously, nobody straight ever sang "Mr. Cellophane"), but it wasn't until he came out that Jensen actually cared about the kid. And then he got hooked, and even after Sandy gave up watching the show at episode seven (in Jensen's opinion, she just didn't understand the complexity of the characters and plot), Jensen kept watching.

He kind of found the _Glee_ fandom by accident, Googling spoilers for the next episode and clicking on a link to a site called LiveJournal. From there things snowballed.

"You know, you're supposed to be working."

Jensen looks up from his iPhone, where he's been looking for spoilers on Kurt's new love interest, and occasionally refreshing his LiveJournal friends' page to see if his favourite WIP has been updated yet. He frowns. "What?"

Sandy points the business end of the knife at him. "I'm not the only prep cook here."

"Sorry. I'm trying to find info on the guy they're getting as Kurt's boyfriend."

"Of course you are."

"What's that supposed to mean?" asks Jensen.

"Nothing," says Sandy.

Jensen shoots her a glare, sets down his phone, and then picks up his knife. "Look, I can multi-task. I'm highly skilled in multi-tasking, see?" He shows off by chopping the red pepper into strips while looking at his phone.

"Just don't chop a finger off," Sandy warns. Jensen ignores her and puts on the Rachel vs Kurt version of "Defying Gravity".

They slice peppers in relative silence, the sounds of the _Glee_ soundtrack playing and Jensen humming along drowning out the sound of the blades on the cutting boards.

Jensen's phone dings and he sets the knife down before looking. He's learned from experience that it's better if he doesn't hold anything that can be used as a weapon when he reads Twitter.

 _PUCK'S BACK! Hopefully he's not pushed aside for Kurt's new "boyfriend"_

"Spurs?" Sandy asks.

Jensen looks up. "Yes. How'd you know?"

"You're growling."

Jensen ignores her and replies to his arch enemy's tweet: _Puck was gone? Huh... I didn't notice. I hope Kurt sings tonight. :)_ Jensen also hopes spursftw17 can feel the searing hatred in his smiley face.

"You're so juvenile."

"Shut up," Jensen says, then starts chopping again.

Spursftw17's reply comes quick: _I hope he doesn't. I hear enough squeaking from my hamster._

Jensen glares and chops furiously, and then screams loudly when he slices his finger.

*

Jensen first interacted with spursftw17 two months into his stay in _Glee_ fandom. He joined a friending meme and, despite the fact that Jensen's a Kurt!boy and she's a Puck!girl, spursftw17 added him. Jensen tried to act civil but spursftw17 is the most obnoxious person he's ever met, and they kind of started this passive-aggressive arguing on any platform they can manage. Jensen joined Twitter just to have another platform to show spursftw17 just how stupid she is for liking Puck.

Halfway through the new episode, Jensen opens his laptop and starts writing Kurt/Blaine fic. It's his first time writing since Finn killed his Furt ship by Calling Kurt a fag, and things flow better than anything Jensen's ever written before. He posts it and labels the pairing "Blurt" and grins for about ten minutes at how cute the whole thing is.

Then his phone pings.

 _WTF WAS UP WITH THIS EPISODE??? Gay dudes trying to push somebody else out of the closet? Kurt ur sick!_

Jensen locks his jaw. Of course spursftw17 would think _that's_ what happened.

 _Not sure what you mean. Kurt was just trying to help him. + Kurt's never knocked up his best friend's girl._

He hopes that dig seeps into spursftw17's soul and eats away at her insides. He'll settle for at least making her cry a little.

His phone beeps again and Jensen's hand actually shakes with anger when he reads it. _?? No of course not - he was to busy molesting his almost step-brother._

Jensen stabs at the screen with determination and then sends, _Did you mean "too"?? Spell check is your friend. :D :D :D_

He shuts his phone off and smirks.

Fucking showed _her_.

*

Despite how opposite they are (Jensen's always right, spursftw17 is always stupid), spursftw17 has good taste in guys. She has a really hot picture of this gorgeous model as her profile pic. He's got shaggy hair and a killer smile, and when spursftw17 says something insanely stupid and batshit, Jensen just clicks on her icon and pretends that's who's on the other end of the computer.

It does wonders to help his mood. And his dick.

*

Spursftw17 is an hour behind Jensen, so he always watches the show an hour later. Jensen tends to rewatch the episode while he waits for spursftw17's stupid, idiotic thoughts about the episode, and the opportunity to show just how biased she is. Like clockwork, at 11:02, spursftw17 always updates her Twitter.

Only tonight she's not. Jensen gets a sick thrill in thinking maybe this episode was the one that ruined the show for her. It's unsettling that, as he continues thinking about this, Jensen finds himself feeling a little saddened as the minutes tick by and spursftw17 doesn't update. He wonders what's up with her.

He stays up fucking late, re-reading some of his favourite fics to keep himself busy, until finally, _finally_ spursftw17 updates.

 _SOO happy Kurt's gone to boarding school! Think that means he'll be written off the show?_

Jensen ignores that he's feeling relieved that she posted, not pissed off, then pauses as he thinks of a comeback. Finally, he decides on, _Doubtful. He's an interesting main character, unlike supporting ones, say... Puck for example._

He doesn't wait for her response. He just shuts his phone off and heads to bed.

*

Jensen opens LiveJournal one morning and finds his flist raving about something called "Gleecon". He does some snooping and finds out what it is--a fandom convention in Ohio, made by the fans for the fans--and immediately checks Twitter. Spursftw17 is raving about signing up and can't wait to meet fellow fans. Then Jensen calls Sandy.  
"Hello?"

"How would you feel about coming with me to a _Glee_ fan convention?  
" Jensen asks.

"I could think of maybe two things I would rather not do than that," Sandy says.

"C'mon, it's going to be awesome! Plus, Spurs is going to be there. I'll finally be able to confront her in person and prove that Kurt is a hundred times better than fucking _Puck_ , and make her cry."

"One, there is so much wrong with that sentence I don't know where to begin, and two, no way. I'm not being arrested for assisted homicide."

"I'm not going to _kill_ her."

"Goodbye, Jensen," says Sandy. Then she hangs up.

Jensen looks at the registration form and chews on his lip, then signs up.

He goes to spursftw17's Twitter and replies to her latest tweet, smirking as he types.

 _I can't wait to see you either!!_

*

Unfortunately, Sandy still refuses to go by the time Gleecon comes around, and Jensen's forced to walk into the hotel alone. He feels slightly less confident without backup, but then he figures he has something spursftw17 doesn't have--a brain. And a favourite character who isn't a total manwhore.

He signs in at the registration desk, has his bags brought to the room he's going to be sharing with two other people, puts his name tag on, then goes down to meet some other fans.

There's a tall guy surrounded by a flock of girls and Jensen shakes his head in sympathy for him. Then the guy turns around, laughing, and Jensen freezes, because _fuck_ if this guy isn't gorgeous. And vaguely familiar, but Jensen can't place him. The guy pauses when he spots Jensen, grin freezing on his face and then slowly shrinking into a small smile. It does thing to Jensen.

The tall guy excuses himself from the girl and walks over, smile still in place, and as he gets closer, Jensen can read his name tag and his mouth opens a little.

The guy holds out his hand and says, "Hi, I'm--"

" _Spurs_?" Jensen asks incredulously, louder than he'd intended. But it's just. Well, for one thing, his arch nemesis who he's nicknamed "Ice Bitch from Hell" is actually a guy. A really fucking _hot_ guy.

This is going to fuck up his make-'em-cry plan.

Spursftw17 looks down and then back up. "Uh, yeah," he says, biting his lip. "And you're... Frackles. Um, wow. I didn't think you'd be so gor--" He shakes his head and scratches the back of his neck. "I mean. I didn't think you'd be a guy."

"I thought you were a girl," Jensen admits. "And that your profile picture on Twitter was a male model."

He flushes as soon as the words leave his mouth, but so does spursftw17.

"I. I mean--"

"I kinda thought the same," spursftw17 admits, lips twitching as he watches Jensen.

"Oh."

"I'm Jared," spursftw17-- _Jared_ \--says evenly, holding out his hand again.

This time Jensen shakes it and says, "Uh, Jensen." He has to keep reminding himself this is the person he's been having character wars with for nearly a year.

Jared licks his lips and runs his hands against his thighs, his eyes looking Jensen over. "So, hey. I, uh, I don't have a roommate--"

Jensen waves a hand. "Hey, sorry man, but I've already got roommates." He raises an eyebrow. "Plus I'm not sure it's good for us to be in a room together anyway. We're kind of high tension on the internet. Actually, we should probably be fighting right now."

Jared huffs and shakes his head. "No, I don't need a roommate. I was, uh," he pauses and his lips morph into a smirk. "Well, I was tryin' to invite you up to, uh... work off that _tension_ we've got going on."

Jensen should be planning Jared's downfall, not contemplating what Jared's dick would feel like in hiss ass, but Jensen just shrugs and smirks right back. "Sounds good."

*

Hate sex, it turns out, is pretty fucking spectacular. Jared's rough and Jensen has to admit that what he lacks in proper character appreciation he sure makes up for in the cock department. Instead of having a heated debate on whose favourite character is better, they fuck messy and hard, Jensen arching against Jared as Jared drives in deeper, bites and bruises everywhere. Jensen likes this choice a lot better.

"So," Jared says, after he's fucked Jensen to hell and back, "I gotta say, Kurt's not looking so bad right now." He grins and sucks two of Jensen's fingers into his mouth and licks around them.

Jensen groans, spent dick already feeling newfound arousal, and bites out, "Yeah? Well I think I found a whole new appreciation for Puck."


End file.
